Hawaii (Pt II) … written by Big Virge 24/11/2014

Hawaii pt. II 

Well, as said American Airlines are an airline I’d only recommend to fukwits’, who have pissed me off, over the last few years !!!!

Says it all really !!!!!

The stewards, with all due respect, looked as bedraggled and rickety, as the aircraft, which was delayed, because of a seat problem, that needed maintenance, in 1st class … as if that should hold the rest of us passengers up …. !!!!!

Anyways, finally off to Miami to see what the next phase of my journey was gonna hold …. 

Well no surprises, missed my connecting flight, but bwoy, was I the only one ???

HELL NO … !!!

So, American Airlines put us up overnight, with vouchers for dinner and breakfast, at some Hilton wannabe, called the Doubletree.

Hmmm, well, it was better than I expected, but, the catch was arriving, sometime after 11.00 pm, due to waiting for a shuttle from the airport for a good 25 mins, and then being put on a connecting flight, with a check in time of 5.30 a.m., which meant that dinner was a late night burger, or, other fast food option, as the main restaurants were already CLOSED, at the hotel, and thus, the breakfast voucher was, unusable, due to our having to leave before breakfast was even started at the hotel the next morning !!!!!

However, being the thinker I am …. I was like, ” Fuck that !”, pay for the poor excuse of a dinner meal, and redeem the breakfast voucher for anything over the dinner vouchers value …. !!!

A very cute lil’ Latina worked worked with me and BOOM …. b4 I knew it … I was back at the airport, having had barely any sleep, and onto an overbooked American Airlines flight to take us from Miami to Dallas. Yup, long trip folks !!!

Another, 8 hour flight awaited me, to get to Maui, but, it was the plane I was originally due to be on, so, had caught up on lost time, even if it was quite the ordeal !!! 

So, after more F’ing shenanigans with rechecking my, already checked in luggage, I then, almost went through a security gate the wrong way !!!!

I finally got on, a yet again, very old, rickety 767 for the Maui trip, out of Dallas !!!!

Again, talk about cut corners, on an 8 hour flight, was there any food other than Turkey F’ing sandwiches and stale chips or crisps for my English heads !!?!! Fuck No !!!!

Somewhat shocking really, they did have some, Guardians of The Galaxy, entertainment, on screens smaller than my Macbook, but that was the best they now seem willing to offer so, it was no surprise there were plenty of empty spaces on this flight !!!! 

Well, have to say, the old girl was smooth and got us to Maui in very good time, so, all’s well that ends well right !!!

Pretty much, so finally, Maui YES … !!!

Only to see a woman, seemingly pushed under her car by security at the airport, who then, vociferously shouted a lot of, “YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE !!!”, as some, classically HUGE, donut looking, and presumably, eating cop, as if out of a movie, cruised over, and I do mean CRUISED !!!

Anyway, off she goes, cussing as she did, which showed me an essence of this beautiful islands vibe, as the policemen did very little, and let her mouth of and go.

My shuttle driver to the hotel was as talkative as they come, and had nothing but great things to say about Maui, which he moved to, due to a woman who he ended up divorcing !!!!

It really is CRAZY, why and how people move around sometimes !!!

As he drove, pointing out this and that, the first sunset of my trip was indeed a site to behold !!! The orangey, yellow colour was simply STUNNING !!! I’ve been a few places in this world now, but man, the landscape and nebulous skies, that overlook the hills, mountains, rain forests and now, inactive volcanoes of Maui, creates incredible sunsets here !!!!!

Anyway, there was some stuffy white guy who got dropped off at a nice enough looking Marriot, as the driver had me at a more plush competitor, just up the road !!!

Well Virgil, jackass that I am, had not checked my hotel info properly !!! So, after getting all excited, having seen this fuck off hotel entrance, and getting to the girls at the front desk, was then told …, “Errrr sir, where you came from is YOUR HOTEL !!!”

We all laughed and happily joked about it !!!

…. and they then, kindly, called my hotel, and arranged for a pick up, and soon enough he came, after I saw a plethora of very expensive cars being valet driven for people staying at this hotel, which my shuttle driver from the airport had said, was better than the other hotel …


Ahhh well …, such is life, but a classically, Hawaii styled greeting of a huge beeded necklace, being given to me upon arrival, made me feel that it was all good, and an immediate room, “bump up” from, ocean view to a premium ocean view, by the check in clerk, set me up for what I was hoping, would be a great time in this clearly,  beautiful island !!!! ….. To be continued ……,

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